What Women Want on Valentine's Day Game?

It's your first V Day together and you're in love:

1. Send her flowers at work--something other than clichéd roses. Try calla lilies or birds-of-paradise.

2. Give her a copy of your favorite novel, movie, or book of art or photography, or a mix CD of your favorites along with a recent book, DVD, or CD that--from what she's told you--she might like.

3. Give them to her (wrapped) during the dessert of a romantic dinner that you've whipped up at your place.

A casual girlfriend and you want to keep it that way:
Invite her out for a Valentine's Day dinner, but nix the gift.

If you've been dating for more than a year:
Buy her something that could conceivably last forever: a painting by a well-respected local artist, a vintage watch or clock, pearl earrings (with small pearls that dangle below the ear), or a cuff bracelet with an embedded stone -- jade or ruby.

If you're married and have done it all before:
Offer to cook her breakfast, then surprise her with heart-shaped blueberry pancakes, pomegranate juice, and coffee in a custom-made V Day mug. (You can get them at most photo shops.) As for what to put on the mug: a picture of you that will crack her up.

Buy your girlfriend lingerie without making it look as if it's for your benefit
Think about what she wants to wear, not what you want her to wear, says Tracey Cox, author of SuperSex and Superflirt. Black or red lace looks "tarty," she says, so stick with soft pink or white, or your girlfriend's favorite color. Cox also recommends Calvin Klein's boy shorts and tank tops -- clingy and revealing, but not trashy.

Second rule: With lingerie, always go high-end. "You can't go wrong with anything from Myla or Agent Provocateur," says Cox. "And package it beautifully. Even the most expensive lingerie looks cheap if it's not put in a box with a ribbon."

By Mike Zimmerman & Nicole Beland.